Sorrow - A Personal Reflection

Growing up, my mom has always told me that "everybody has a sad story to tell". AS a young girl, I never fully appreciated or understood this thought. It took me a long time to see past my own tragedies, disappointment, fears, and anxieties. However, I have been more able to extend my own sad feelings to others and have found comfort and strength in realizing that all individuals are joint by same emotions and natural fears and tendencies.

I find that Denver perfectly sums up the feeling of loneliness the most people experience at some point, usually many times. Denver grows up in almost impossible circumstances and survives. She goes through an ocean of emotional distress but ultimately fights through her problems and becomes a stronger person. Denver transforms drastically with the departure and the loss of her brothers and Baby Suggs, which causes her to become isolated and self centered. Denver feels like she is detached from the world after her tragic losses. She even tells Sethe that she "can't live here. Nobody speaks to us. Nobody comes by. Boys don't like me. Girls don't either". 

I have not experienced a serious loss in my family like Denver, however I have experienced loss in other ways. In my freshman year of high school my parents had separated and my mom was forced out of our home. I resented my parents for almost two straight years, confused by the changes and my own emotions. I have witnessed my mom make herself ill from guilt and loneliness. And just this year I watched my dad be hospitalized and bed-sick for eight full months. My parents have not yet departed, but many times have I felt as if they were already gone. 

These experiences, make me and Denver alike, in times when"solitude had made [me] secretive - self manipulated". "Years of haunting" has "dulled" me in many ways and has made me numb to many ill experiences. (117) I believe that the harsh and seemingly impossible tragedies that I feel mirrored in Denver, curate a superego that judges my own self and others deeply and harshly. I believe also that since everyone has a sad story to tell that each person in this world can and does make judgments particularly based on the tragedy they have endured. 

Reading Beloved and connected deeply to Denver, I believe that it is possible to find relief in sharing with others during times of extreme sadness. And that it is possible to choose your own attitude or judgment in any given circumstance, when you harness enough strength and will power.